Drama - tox

Oh shit, I just realized something. History is repeating itself… my dating history… but more on that later…
Most, if not all girls have watched He’s Just Not That Into You. The main character, Gigi, reminds me of myself in some ways that I am not very proud of.
She was over zealous in her search for love, throwing herself at every guy who showed the slightest bit of interest. She’d let her imagination run wild, and see said guy and herself in a long – term relationship, even though it was only the first date.
In the end, after much heartache and soul – searching, she realized that she was not the exception; the girl who manages to find happily ever after with her soul mate in record time, but that instead, she was the rule.
I, like Gigi, am the rule. And like she did in the movie, I need to change the way I look at things. No more J.D – esque daydreams about happily – ever – after a few days into a flirtation, no more sitting around for hours analyzing everything about a conversation with a guy and spinning it to suit me, and no more wasting time on someone who clearly is just not that into me. I’m tired of all the drama that comes with it…
That said, getting over Seximus Prime (the guy from to posts ago) and his ridiculous love making is number one on my drama – tox list. He says he’s not in the right place for anything serious right now but is down for something casual. Which I’m not sure I want to get into for the simple reason that I’m far too emotional for casual sex… That and the “I’m not ready” excuse has been overdone; the girl feels sorry for you because of your previous relationship problems, you say you’re not ready but she hears that you’re not ready YET, and she ends up hanging around basically playing the girlfriend role, but not realizing how disposable she is…
What else is on my drama – tox list? I’m not sure yet, all I know is, I need to simplify my life, it’s getting wildly out of control…
Sigh…
[listening to: I don’t trust myself (with loving you) – John Mayer]